Physics was somewhat fun even though I wasn't listening one bit. Alan and I were talking about how our teacher's hand motions looked like he was wacking somebody off instead of trying to simulate a wave. A few moments of that class were so happy until the weird change of mood.
For some reason, I think I pissed off Ben by saying something and he totally acted like a jerk. Ugh, it didn't help when he started to talk exactly like Cary, my old "best friend". Shit, how I wanted to punch Ben in the face and strangle him. The next period and I was feeling worse; holding in tears while ignoring every person trying to cheer me up and abusing Derrick whenever he asked if I was alright. Everybody asked if I was alright due to my lack of "smiles and cheerful talk". Even the teacher asked, so I forced and smile as she assumed I was tired from the break.
I become the worst person ever when I'm mad or trying to hold in feelings. If Derrick got his hand close to me to comfort him, I'd slap it away; people would stare at us while I'd go back to my motionless position. When Ben took out his lighter and put it near me, I punched his hand away in attempt to knock it from his hand; he was silent while Alan would comment on how I was feeling.
I can't even remember if I was ever like this before. I even do it to my parents now..it's terrible that I'm so disrespectful and I know it myself.
Finally, tears falling down as I hit the first step down the stairs of the first floor. I was only welcomed to arms of a loving boy.
MUSIC INSPIRATION OF THE DAY
Machinima videos always cheer me up; the people that do videogame commentary and make music for them are simply hilarious.
